Yeah, so I got really behind after being sick, slammed by end-of-the-semester work in college, and then hit holidays... I had to reevaluate how I was spending my time and what I was getting for it.
This whole project was founded on a sort of silly basis - making shivs recreationally and posting pictures - so I never had spectacularly high hopes for it. But after pulling in only five people to follow the blog after more than two months of dedicated shiv making, and absolutely no more in this interim where I've been swamped or had more important (or interesting) things to do, I feel like I've reaped very little for the sowing.
Again, silly basis and all notwithstanding, this is a very time-consuming thing to do. Even that silly Cereal Killer shiv, made of cardboard from a cereal box, took two attempts to plot and cut it correctly and a well over half an hour to get it decent and reinforced - now think about how much it takes for something that's actually involved, with hammered metal, or needing an edge ground for the blade. This doesn't even touch scavenging materials, cleaning up after working (though I admittedly do a half-assed job of that) or the cost of materials or tools that had to be purchased (such as the grinding wheels my Dremel has burned through). For all this, I really expected, and I thought conservatively, to have a good fifteen followers by now that I did not know personally and IM one day to say "hay plz follow mai blog okay?"
In short; I'm pulling a very poor return for my efforts.
I can't keep up with it, there's not enough reason to keep up with it, and by now I would have to back-date more than two months' worth of shivs, which is downright unreasonable. I am tentatively going to continue working on this, but I am no longer going to slave over doing this as a daily venture. I could have rebooted it all and started reposting/redating the previous 80 shivs for this year - and this was an attractive option, since I had only 5 followers that could be remotely bothered by it. I settled on just shrugging off this sense of obligation to post daily, instead, and now I am just going to post them when I've made some or feel like it. I'm still going to shoot for that 365 shivs, and if this is ever published (I dunno, like a silly calendar or something?) there'll still be a year's worth of shivs.
But this, again, is tentative. I'm right now feeling pretty fortunate that this doesn't feel like massive bellyaching or some luggage that's been weighing me down, just a matter-of-fact evaluation and acceptance that the format wasn't working as it was. Realistically, if I had been able to keep up with this as originally planned to this point, I am confident I would still be arriving at the conclusion that the pace is not as sustainable as it seemed. This way, however, I have a clear exit strategy that doesn't feel like a burden.
I'll see some of you later.